Amazon #2a: The Lord of the Rings Trilogy - STUPIDITY UPDATE

I've just about learned to live with all the stupidity in the world - when I was younger, stupidity was my enemy, along with the people who I considered stupid, and it made me genuinely angry. But with a bit of age, maturity, and the occasional ill-tempered beating, I've finally understood that stupidity is inescapable - we're all capable of it at various times, and as long we can understand and appreciate that then I believe it to be more of a virtue than a curse. But even trying to identify stupidity in other people is a dangerous road to go down - an unavoidable byproduct of that is that you identify yourself as superior somehow, and elitism of that kind is still capable of making me REALLY angry. (that said, identifying and mocking stupidity is tremendous fun, and should be encouraged at all times - ladies and gentlemen, boneddigion a boneddigednigadi, I am walking hypocrisy.)

I digress - the number of comments my amazon review of Lord of the Rings has attracted is enough to make me despair of humanity all over again - these people are total fucking idiots, and I pity them so much that I even mock their grammar (which is dangerous for someone who uses commas as liberally as I do without, much of an understanding of where they should, actually go). I wouldn't mind so much, but I don't even think it was that subtle an attempt at humour... Anyway, here they are:

"Mr. S. N. Macpherson says:
do you comment on every film where something from fantasy was in it?

did u comment on the terminator movies and say that it is rubbish becuase you have never seen a robot fire a gun?

this movie was fantasy so dont say its bad because you have never seen an orc"

Have you seen Terminator 3? Utter cunge. I can say it's rubbish while giving any reason I choose.

"A. Seneviratne says:
You realy need to live a little.
you've probablry just put forward the worst argument in film history.
you don't dserve to write reviews."

Maybe not; but you sir, do not deserve hands.

"Mandy says:
I understand that everyone's entitled to their own opinions, but i honestly can't understand why you would watch a film well known to be a "fantasy" movie and then proclaim its plot to be ridiculous. Secondly, the characters that are featured in the book/film aren't an affront to your intelligence, they're just what the film's about, which would be why they are "endlessly paraded" in front of you. Why, if you know you think fantasy plots to be "ridiculous", would you watch all ten hours of the films and then complain about doing so? Philistine."

Mandy/Mandrew is notable for being the only person to have responded to my further 'comic' outbursts on amazon - I replied with: "Mandrew - I'd love to "reply" to your thoughtfully considered "comments", but I'm afraid that life is too "short". Canaanite". This resulted in:

Mandrew says: If life is too short, why waste ten hours of it watching something you don't like? "Jackass".

I was distraught with salty tears. What else could I say? Nothing but the truth: "That was mean and you made me cry."

So, I thought that was that. Between my attempts to lampoon the individuals involved, my friend Katy joining in the fun and with a few other people saying that they thought the review was funny, I really didn't think that anyone else could fall into the trap that I never intended to lay in the first place. My friends - I did a very dangerous and inadvisable thing. I overestimated the internet. Today, I found this:

"Buyer from UK says:

I don't know why people are bothering to argue with this narrow minded person. It's obvious he can't see past his own nose! If he wants to "waste his precious little life" and walk around with his eyes closed, let him! He obviously just doesn't get it and never will! Put it this way, there's always one isnt there?"

My response: "I wish. As the comments have proved - in this case, there are 4 and counting." Buyer from UK, the rapier-witted son of a gun countered with:

"Buyer from UK says:
It's not a case of comments. It's the content and "stupidity" of your comment, which is why "you" have 14 replies to it!"

My response: "MY COMMENT WAS NOT STUPID. I still fail to see why 10 hours of seriously far-too-extreme-fiction is hailed as a masterpiece, when it's something that my 3 year old could have drawn. I'd far prefer a 3 film treatment of the agonising dullness of the human condition, mainly conducted by arguing on the internet - you know, something with some relevance to our lives."

I would be incredibly surprised if another comment that took me seriously landed on that review - I think it has been put to bed now. But hey, I've been wrong before...

NB: My genuine opinion on Lord of the Rings - it's worth watching once, though I don't think it really stands up to repeat viewings... I don't care for it that much at all though. Even though the second film is the best, I think the whole trilogy seems to get worse as it goes along - the final hour is seriously excruciating. I was almost tempted to shit myself to try and relieve the tedium. I now regret that I didn't.